the C word

Cancer . Motherfucking Cancer  i wish it would leave my family alone  my grandmother had skin cancer but got it removed  my grandfather lost his life to the fight of lung cancer and now  my grandmother is about to go to war with sage 3...

its ok to wounder what if right?

i find myself asking myself  "what if this " or "what if that"   i wouldnt chang my life  and what i have  yes i want better.b ut i cant help to wounder what my life would be like or if i am doing it all right ..  i  wounder what my life would be...

Dear Father.

why were they not in my life more? why did i come last when you  were dating someone? why did my grandmother raise me ? why did you help me when i became pregant ? why didnt you try to help me stay in school? why are you not are in my...

its been a little bit..

jan 2017 was whenever i last posted so much has happen some smalll some big so put your selt belts on as i up date  it will take a sec... Fed-i hit my two year mark of bigging married  i pland a trip tosix flags and the aquarium took the day just...

last weeks meeting ..

so last week i had a child support meet where myself and my baby daddy to my oldest meet in the small room with a big desk and a woman i know nothing about but for her name.  this time wasnt as bad as others but he wasnt happen with the out come.. ...

My Motherhood is my Life .

whenever i found out how baby where made and born  i told myself way before i ever had sex that if i was to end up at a teen mother i wouldnt giveup onmyself nor my child that didnt ask for the life it would have ...   i was 17 i stole a pee...

To My Husband.

Dear Husband, If you ever get to see my Beautiful blog this is just for you. i know i have told you many many times before  and i will say it againg i am so fuckng thankful for you  i am so lucky i found you i am glad you are able to...

Here is good-Bye to 2016

so many things hit me when i think about my life and the year i have had .. good bad and the ugly, here is a few things i dealt with.... - 1st year i havent moved.( going to have to move in 2017 though) -had my tudes tied,no more making...

can i have a day off form my life?

so i i have 3 kid and 2 grownups living in my house, i get goverment help i dont workmy husband dose and we have one car and one of my 3 kids are in school  next augs it will be 2 inschool.. i planed on working next year and paying for one kids child...

egg shells

in one of my other post i talkedabout my motherlaw telling my husband i was to hard on the kids.. will..... she will be coming in town for a the hoildays and most like with us on chirstmas moring. i love my motherlaw dont get me worng i just...

this weekend

my 9 month old has been sick for 3 days now , i hated it i hated that i could only do so much and i hated that my lazy husband never helped with my other house hold duitys ... i had to take my son to there i ask him to put up leftovers and handled bed...

i am at lost for words

today my step child when back homeand when ever my husband took my steo child to mee his mother whom she lives with of 16hrs away  and my husbands mother told my husband i was to hard on the 4 kids we have but whenever he told me we were in a heat...

lost for words

this past two week has made my heart hurt, i want to help but i dont know how to help without being to much... i found out my little brother(20) whom is due to havehi 1 child in dec.he pulled my mom out of her car and pined her up against the...

my oldest Baby Boy.

i am a mother to a very smart handsome litte boy . he has been 7 for a week now  not only is the new to me and him .. 7 wow where has the time gone... but starting this weekend his dad how lives about an hr form us is planing on getting him each...

I Am Back.

i have not blogged in a long time so much has changed in my life  i am not sure what my older bolgs are about so bare with me.. i have moved back to the little town that i some what grow up in.... i dont know anyone,once again.. i ama full time...

vent!!!

i have a few things i need to vent about.. part one my step child live in a diffent state with her"gig" and her mother loive in the same town. will he mother has a past of durgs and few other thinks that a mother wouldnt want there kids around....

a litte about my past....

so i have realized oters do read this or i like to think they do.. so here is a more of a highlight on my life up to where i am today but, before i start i want the reads to know that i have made choices in my life i am sad or even hate knowing or...

check in

i havent posted in a few days , havnt had much alone time to post, fyi my husband dosnt know i post or have a blog no one know that i know . i just wamt to know if anyone my read my blogs .. see on the 19th witch was friday i went out with my...

6. 16 .15

yesturday i became 24, i feel the same as i did before  my big day was good i guess just had to deall with windstream for two hrs and the me and am my love going in to it ..   i dont think i was welcome to have a good birthday after all anyways...

6. 10 .15

walked away and gave up . but giveing up on something or someone you care for is not so easy. but now that i have gave myself time to move on i have a husdand and a family that loves me for me.  just as i dreamed for. so why do i still hate myself for...

here gose nothing.

i have never blogged before but i need an outlit for myself. so heres some stuff about me to help you understand. i cant spell to save my life. i am a stay at home mother of two1 yearold girl and a 5 year old son) and a step child 4 year old...